You know Sarah, I am easing back to my private world once again. Beginning today I think I can do away with just remaining by myself. It all depends on the Big I. If it is up to me I am happy just being small.
I was off track with my morning routine this past few days. The weather was not conducive for me to exercise. On top of that I had a lot of things in my mind.
Hence I look forward to be in isolation again. I realized that nobody else matters here. Just you that counts.
You are all that I got. Even if we are to make things happen, it is very much dependent on you.
While I had enforce the full capacity of what I need to do, nothing matters really until you make it happen.
So I decided to go back to my microscopic mold. Back to AHAD and OMAD.
You should know me by now Sarah, I am a very simple man.
As far as I am concern, this arrangement that we have now is already perfect.
Sure I got a message to deliver. However, I the messenger and the message I deliver are two different entities.
Me as a person is pretty much focused on my Personal Flight Path. However as the conduit to the Big I, I have to deliver the message to you. I personally don't feel comfortable doing that. Mainly because I have no control of the outcome. But because I am a servomechanism, I just do what I was told to do.
That had always been the case for the past 20 years when I became the Creator's Most Loyal Soldier.
I hope you can differentiate between the two. I am nothing more than a Clockwork Orange all this while. Often my calling takes the precedence of my personal agenda.
That's the price I must pay as the conduit to the Big I. Of course there is a fringe benefit. By doing so I become God and God becomes me. The only setback it I have to be a servomechanism and obey no matter how uncomfortable it is at times like involving my family and friends in the whole thing. The risk that I have to face is being labeled as crazy.
This is the burden I have to carry Sarah. Only you know how heavy is this burden.
I hope none of this is in vain. It is very embarrassing situation to be in. Then again who out there is willing to carry this burden? Who among the many out there are willing to lose all and remain steadfast as the Creator's Most Loyal Soldier?
I am sharing all these with you so that you can see that I am taking a very big risk in exposing myself. Let's hope it is worthwhile.
I am not going to burden you unnecessarily. If there is nothing to be done I will not make up some imaginary task for you to do. What I had shared with you are the bare essentials. I don't cook those things behind my backyard. Those are really the essentials for you to proceed on your end.
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