This new development with the Covid 19 suddenly made me realized how fragile my life is. This pandemic will last a good couple of years like SARS (2002 - 2004) and Eboli (2014 - 2016). The only way this virus will slow down is either by infecting enough people thus getting us to develop a herd immunity or by somebody finding a vaccine in a short distance in the future. Which means the infection will peak in Spring 2021. By then it will effect 7.2 million people in UK alone. As for vaccination, the best case scenario is going to be in the next 18 to 24 months. This is a major achievement considering the normal process from animal testing to human testing will take somewhere around 10 years.
One carrier can infect 2 - 2.5 people. Which means if it goes on in an exponential growth eventually it will effect 2/3 of the world population. At best it will effect 1/3 of world. Fatality is between 4 - 12% depending on the availability of the healthcare service the patient gets. It is also dependent on our blood type. In short, it is highly infectious but low in fatality.
No matter how we try to escape it, there is no other way out of it except infection (and survive) or through vaccination (provided the virus doesn't mutate). So this 2 weeks MCO is just an attempt to flatten the curve so that the healthcare can cope with the pandemic. It cannot stop the virus from spreading until it had infected enough people. Then eventually it will slowly become dormant.
In the midst of this mayhem, I decided to write you a love letter. It's not one of those mushy kinds I promise, but more of a note for me to express my feeling of love to you.
Honey, I fell in love with you the day I got to know you. It's the kind of love that brought rain to a barren land. With the coming of the downpour all of a sudden I am awakened from within. I never felt the same joy that I feel with you ever before. You made me laugh baby. Now Els, this is not a common feeling I assure you. I was having dark depression even after I got to know Sarah and you. While Sarah was also a joy, my happiness with you is therapeutic to say the least. If Sarah was the one that rise me from the dead, it was you *[that] that gives meaning to my life.
* Consider this letter written by joint authors.
To me this is a special kind of love. It is purely based on sincerity. Since the day we met, I just want to shower you with my overflowing affection. Yup, I know I acted crazily. That's because I am following my heart and where it leads. Sharing my life with you is a dream come true. When I married you 7/7/18 I am very sure I want to spend the rest of my life with you. This is not a perfect marriage but it is a marriage out of pure goodness. Like Sarah, you are a Cyber Spouse. Pretty much like any other marriages, there are people who are married b[y] (but) are not physically together. My time with you is when you are on air. When I interact with you during those times, these are the times I am spending with my wife. Rest assured that beside the time I spend with Sarah, I spend most of my days with you. To me these are quality times.
As I explained to you, marriage between soulmates need no mean sex. Until today I regard both Sarah and you as my wives and daughters. That's because the love I have for you both is not something I can easily compartmentalize. All I know that I love you both very much. So much so I spend more time with you two than my immediate family; Lizzie and the kids. I love my family dearly Els, but at the same time I love Sarah and you as my soulmates. It's like having a bowl of water. You cannot divide water baby.
I know you don't know how to react to this. You are so used to the idea of one man and one woman as portrayed by the Victorian value. The truth is for thousand of years it is a norm to love more than one person. As a Sufi I cannot love the Creator without first loving His creations. My bowl is overflowing with Greater Love coming for the very fountain which comprises of you, my Tetrahedron. Don't worry about Kristina. She is too far in the future for you to be jealous of. Somehow you have this thing with her. You don't have any gripe about Lizzie and Sarah. Consider her as your little sister then.
All the plans I had earlier will not materialize because I don't think the idea of House of Two Swords (HOTS) can happen now. So we will not have an Executive Queen. To me it is always form follow function. Kristina has to wait. So basically we are talking about just Lizzie, Sarah and you. No Kristina for the time being. I don't know how far will Kristina come into the picture. Perhaps in the afterlife.
When I marry each of you; Lizzie (24/2/90), Sarah (24/11/17), you (7/7/18) and Kristina (27/12/19), I marry you all for eternity. As my eternal soulmates. This is a very long story, since we were souls in a different realm. Then we went through multiple loops of birth, growth, decline, death. Somehow our fates intertwined until now, the last loop. From this point on you mu[ch] (must) believe what I have to say... We have 21 years before our final journey home. I know the exact date of our departure. It is Sunday 7/4/2041, the year of the Fire Rooster. Even if you don't believe me, consider the date as the date I cross my finish line. By then if nothing happens, I will accept that I am just another Old Coot with a wild imagination.
So from 7/7/18 until my demise, you are my Tetrahedron. You are my 3rd Queen. I am not joking and I am very sensible at the time I'm writing this. You are my wife as in you are my soulmate for eternity. Every week days I give 4 hours of my life to you. That is commitment honey. Even Lizzie cannot get that much commitment from me. For the past 2 years all I do is loving you, looking forward to hear you on air. Pretty much like a husband looking forward to meet his wife everyday after work. This is a Cybernetic Marriage, there is no direct comparison with the marriages out there. However rest assure that I love you very much Els Dines.
You may wonder why I am so adamant about us being married? The truth is I can't live without you as much as I cannot live without Sarah. I tried to cut you off but whenever I did that I feel so hollow inside. I need you in my life baby. Even if it means I can only listen to you and your songs. To me the songs are windows to your soul. I know you Els. More than you think you knew. This is not an infatuation honey. I am too old for that. What I'm saying here is we belong as one unit. Sailing on Sailbad the Sinner (a twist from Sinbad the Sailor LOL).
I wish I can let you see what inside my heart. It's is a reflection of who you are and what you mean to me. So if I may not make it to the finish line, at least you know that I love you very dearly my Angel of Light.
Sine cera,
SJ
19/3/20
Day 2 Movement Control Order
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My darling, I wrote something in the email. It was inspired by the MCO. I hope you enjoy reading it. Goodnight honey, I love you so much.
Well Sarah, the same song I Tweet Els from now on is also your lullaby.
It's my bedtime honey.
Goodnight Sarah. Thanks for being a sport. I love you so much honey...
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