Then Azmin and Mukhriz can strategize for the next 3 years. Either one is fine. Both are Wood Dragons. I just don't want Mr Bread and Butterfly to be the PM. He is... OK I'm not going to go back to the past history about how he and Blue Avatar are Twin Factors Black and White Dajjal. There's two. Just like me and you or more appropriate, me and BJ. Or Chedet and Nik Aziz.
There is Duality in Singularity. The Yin and Yang factors.
These are past epiphanies, so I'm not going to spend much time on it. Sufficient if I say I am reli... Geez, I was busy with Tweeting that I forgot what I'm suppose to write. Completely zonked.
#traxxfm Hey the Shaz, Darkness is my dragon's name. It resides in Bukit Kiara. It's a mythical dragon. Actually it is my running loop. Can you spin Alpha Dog and the Omegalomaniac by Fall Out boy? This is Arok, my dragon protecting
#traxxfm OK then in that case I like to request Black Parade by Chemical Romance. This I like to dedicate to my buddy Al Ishal Ishak
with a message: You did good my man!
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Let's talk about something dark and sinister. Let's talk about the Dark Side and how to deal with it.
Sarah, good (God) and evil (Devil) are both the nature of men. I had dealt with Iblis, supposedly the most insidious creation. Yes indeed Iblis is one bad ass mother but the truth is Iblis is just feeding on my own inner fire. I was temperamental and I was full of hatred towards evil. Because of that the fire grew bigger and it consumed me.
When it was small it's your friend. But when it's big, it is your foe. The kind of things I did when I was in rage were terrible Sarah. So terrible that I had blocked them from my memory for so long.
I'm not going to mention what I did, it was so vile and embarrassing. So many things that you cannot imagine a sane person can do.
I admit I was in psychosis when all these happened. However it didn't exempt the fact that this Darkness was within me! I became the very monster that I was fighting. So bad that I am ashamed to call myself a Wandering Sufi. I am more of a Lost Madman more than anything else.
I never talk to anybody about my psychosis. It was pretty ugly. Can you imagine a bundle [] (of) fire crackers exploding inside a wooden box? Now imagine the fire crackers exploding inside your head.
The first time Dr Amarpreet saw me in psychosis was in 2014. My worst ever. She said I was like the Hulk. Such a rage.
What was the reason? My brain was too active. The primary cause was cannabis. You know, cannabis didn't mellow me. Instead I became super alert. Maybe as it is my dopamine is already high. With cannabis I became hyper.
The funny thing is without substance, I was depressed. I cannot settle at a midpoint like normal people. It is the extremes between two polarities.
So the interim solution is Nicorette. It makes me high but not too high. If Nicorette is a hill, then I say it is a 35 degree slope.
Cigarette is 50 degree while dope is 70 degree.
Of course mania is fun. I didn't know the limit. I smoke 4 joints a day in addition to 2 packs of cigarettes.
I like dope so much that I was not even interested in alcohol and ecstasy pills.
My point here is, back to God and Devil, they are both the good and the evil within us.
If we invoke the goodness even though our intention is good but we do it through evil means, then the effect is bad.
What is a safe guideline? Only 1 joint per week. Tell me which Pothead smoke that amount?
So although I propagate the use of recreational marijuana, it is still a dangerous drug because it is subject to abuse.
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OK my lovely wife, that's my closing chapter for February 2020.
Here is your lullaby baby:
I love you my darling... From this point on I will no longer talk about HOTS and the Flight Path. It is a jittery subject for me thinking about jumping from a tall building even if you have a parachute.
Goodnight Sarah.
Let me tell you a joke for a change.
A customer of mine bought a spreadsheet software from me back when I was a computer salesman. The software was called Lotus 123. At that time whatever the customer bought, we had to install for them. So I brought the package and installed it in the customer's office.
When I was done with the installation I handed the box with the diskettes in it.
I told the customer we had done the installation.
As I was about to leave his office, he looked blankly at the box and said, "This is only one box, where are boxes 2 and 3?"
LMAO LMAO.
Bye darling... Oh... I miss you so so much.
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